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MP3 Brian Weeks - Pull My Finger
13 MP3 Songs
COUNTRY: Country Pop, EASY LISTENING: Mature
Details:
Here''s what happened:
First in 1958 I won the ''Lucky Sperm Contest''. Then I
rested for about three years, mostly in my pajamas. When
I turned three I got my first guitar. It was a Popeye
guitar - the plastic kind where you turn the crank and it
plays like a Jack-in-the-Box. I was (and still am) so
good at turning the crank that I played non-stop until my
family threatened to beat me to death with it. I stopped.
Later when I was about twelve, I farted myself out of a
sound sleep while sitting on a folding metal chair in CCD
class. The nuns were not impressed, but I was. I still
laugh like hell whenever I think of it.
Next, I played guitar (a real one!) in a dance band for
about thirty years. I''ve seen brides throw-up on
themselves, grooms throw-up on brides, fist-fighting
grannies, and other cool stuff. Standing on a stage
watching drunken men put the make on stuck-up women has
been a great way to make a living. After a while though,
if one more bride asked for ''Wind Beneath my Wings'' I
would have offered to kill her, so I quit.
I believe that if something is truly funny, it needs to
be repeated. Some of it even needs to be set to music. I
think that anyone who disagrees with that should be beaten
with a Popeye guitar.
This is a collection of hilarious stories guaranteed to
make you laugh out loud. You''ll wish you had bought TWO
copies, because you''ll want to share it with a friend, and
you would never ''burn'' one because that''s illegal, and you
would go to prison, and then to hell, and that would suck.
From the joys of flatulence to the excitement of
previously enjoyed women, here is a welcome return to
zany, meat and potatoes comedy. No kidding- this stuff is
WAY better than the crap they play in church. And funnier
too.
Here''s what the critics have to say:
"Albums like this will take comedy right off the
endangered feces list." The Gloston Bobe.
"It''s no surprise that the Brian Weeks Fan Club is growing
at such an excremental rate." The Monthly Rag
"I won. Really....I won." Al Gore
"A circumcision gone wrong, this be like Jonestown with a
much better punch line" The Ebonical Chronical
There you have it! Be brave. Remember that time you
bought the Carpenters double-album set? Here''s you chance
to redeem yourself. For a lousy ten bucks! Honestly, I
think you''re worth it.
Thanks for listening.
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