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MP3 Julia Seal - Poiema
12 MP3 Songs in this album (48:06) !
Related styles: SPIRITUAL: Contemporary Christian, JAZZ: Jazz-Pop
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This is my Story...
My name is Julia Seal, but my friends call me Julie. I have been a Christian since December 29, 1976. My conversion was pretty dramatic. I was an angry, suicidal teenager who was spinning out of control. My mother couldn’t handle me anymore, so she put me on a bus headed for a Christian camp. Shawn Morrow, the youth pastor, was the first person I could remember who treated me with kindness and respect. He introduced me to Jesus Christ and I received Him as my personal savior. I was so amazed that the Creator of the Universe loved me! On that day, I was changed. I can’t explain it, except to say that God took my broken heart and gave me a brand new heart!
When I got home, my mother and I went to church as often as we could. She bought me a Bible, and I spent a lot of time with the youth group and Pastor Shawn. I remember sitting next to him as he lead worship, just listening to him sing to the Lord. It was as though his voice went right to the throne of God! It was then that I knew that this was what I wanted to do with my life. I sang for the first time that Easter, and Shawn played the guitar for me as I sang “Psalm 5.” After that, I bought a guitar and Pastor Shawn’s wife (her name was also Shawn) gave me lessons. From that moment on, I was hooked! If anyone had told me then, when I was 15, that I would become a singer/songwriter, I wouldn’t have believed it. It’s amazing that God not only reached out to me, but also gave me more than I ever asked for. I can’t imagine not being able to sing or write, because it is as natural to me as breathing. These are God-given abilities… I didn’t earn them and I don’t deserve them. Isn’t God wonderful?
The truth is, I shouldn’t be able to sing at all! I was born with a “cleft palate.” I had a remarkable surgeon, and most people don’t notice it. I have no speech impediment. In fact, I have never even been to speech therapy. The uniqueness of my voice is because of the way I was born. One of my favorite scriptures is Psalm 139:14, “I will give thanks to Thee, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” God made me this way for a special purpose, and I believe I owe it to Him to share what He has done. My music is a result of God’s work in my life as He carried me through circumstances that would have been unbearable without His loving hand. The most difficult trial of all was losing my daughter, Nicole Laurise.
Nicole was born on October 16, 1986. On that day, I found out that my birth defect was hereditary. She had five surgeries before she was two years old, but she was an incredibly happy child. We had a bond that I couldn’t understand. I couldn’t imagine living without her. But in addition to being a new mother, I was also a battered wife. Nicole’s father said that if I told anyone about the abuse that he would take Nicole from me, and he was true to his word. I was told by an officer of the court that my daughter would be taken away from both of us and put in a foster home if I didn’t sign the papers. Due to her need for medical care, I didn’t believe this was an option. I believed that her father loved her, and that growing up with one parent was better than no parents. And I still had visitation rights, so I signed the papers. It wasn’t long before I lost visitation rights, too. I had to learn to let go and trust that God would care for my daughter. The last day I saw her was Christmas Day, 1989. As I drove her home, I cried the entire time. She held my hand and said, “Don’t cry, Mommy. I’ll take care of you.” Those were the last words I ever heard her say.
The years have passed quickly and quite painfully. Losing Nicole caused me to take a good hard look into my life, and I didn’t like what I saw. My new husband had become a Christian, and he had a peace in his heart that I used to have. I knew that only God could heal my broken heart, so I re-dedicated my life to the Lord. When Douglas came back from his first men’s retreat, he asked me to go to the vocalist fellowship at church. He had met the worship leader and told him all about me. I told him I wouldn’t go unless he went with me, so he did. The next time, I went by myself, and that night I wrote my first worship song, When He Comes, which I recorded on a worship CD. The lyrics speak of how there would be no more pain when Jesus comes for His church. There have been many more songs since then. They speak of God’s faithfulness and enduring love, which carries me through each and every day. I would not have survived the last 13 years had it not been for the Lord. He used my new friends at church to encourage me during the difficult times. They cried with me, prayed with me, and reminded me that God is taking care of my daughter. She is safe in His arms.
Nicole is almost 23 years old now, but in my heart she is still my baby. People who say, “Time heals all wounds” have obviously never really suffered! Time made life more difficult because of everything I missed. I never got to see her go to her first day of school or lose her first tooth… I missed it all.
I am no longer able to have children. Nicole is my only child. It is difficult when all of my friends have kids and all I have is a cat! I have, however, spoiled the cat completely rotten, which helps a bit. The thing that I must stress is that God didn’t do this to me. I chose to get married without lifting my decision up to the Lord. He sent many people my way to tell me that I should not marry this man, but I didn’t listen. I would ask you not to judge Nicole’s father, but to pray for him. Without God, we are all capable of the worst sins. I am so grateful to God for keeping His hand on me and continually carrying me through this trial.
After 13 long years of waiting, I was reunited with my daughter on December 29, 2002. What an amazing day that was. We laughed and cried and hugged a lot! We are re-building the relationship that was taken from us, and she is doing very well. Please continue to pray for Nicole and I, as we are learning about each other and are finally becoming mother and daughter. God has taken such great care of us, so I''m sure we will be just fine.
It has taken many years, but this project is finally a reality. These songs come from the intense trials I have gone through, and reflect God’s hand carrying me through them. When you give your burdens to God, He carries them for you. He doesn’t bring up all of the “stuff" you did in the past, and He will never hurt you. He is so gracious!
It is my desire, as you listen to this music, that you would come to realize that only God can mend a broken heart. He doesn’t merely “repair” your broken heart, but He gives you a new one. He will never leave you or forsake you. Put your trust in Him!
Sincerely,
Julia Seal
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